wishing I can make everything ok for everyone

Why do I feel like its my job, responsibility, burden, whatever you choose to label it, to make everything ok.

What will be considered ok anyways? Once it is ok, does the cycle just repeat itself? Even if it is ok, things still have to be maintained. So technically, it is never ok because that job/responsibility/burden will still fall on someone to keep things..ok.

I'm probably not making sense to most people. This is written out of the moment in reaction to a conversation that just took place with my brother. I'm sitting on the toilet with the seat down and my laptop. Just had to leave the room, couldn't sit there next to him and cry. blah.

I hate being back at square one with everything. Its just like the first half of last year. The same worries, headaches, and heartaches. He breaks me and makes me to depend on Him. He brought me through it and provided in more ways than one. He will again, I know it. It's just hard in the mean time because I don't know when and how...

Lord,

Help me not be bitter over past circumstances and people who've played a role in things leading up to this point. Show me my role and what I need to continue doing or not doing. Open doors for me so I can do things that are not for myself but to try and help make things ok for others.

Please hear me..
J.