hit and run (another first, in life and in 2010)

(the email I sent out) I just want to cry...so frustrated about everything, but I know I need to hold on...

hi guys,


I just need to share/vent since this just happened not too long ago. So hope you don't mind reading or praying for me real quick. thanks in advance!

I was heading home from small group tonight, driving in the most normal circumstances, and got hit for the first time ever. And it had to be a hit and run. I'm ok physically, shaken up, but mostly frustrated at myself and just everything in general. I could care less if I were hit, but that is...in my own car and by someone with insurance, I never expected a hit and run.

I was driving my brothers car too! I know he loves his car even though its not the newest or in the best condition and I know he tells me, "its ok, its only a car" because its me. He would flip if this were my dad. I feel so horrible even though it wasn't my fault at all.

I am so upset at myself for not getting a chance to get the plates. For not realizing quick enough that they weren't going to pull over and planned to hit and run. For not shifting fast enough and up to speed to catch up with them.

I was on Westheimer turning left onto Wilcrest at the green turn only light with no one was behind me. I turned into the left lane on Wilcrest and I'm the only one on the road among both lanes. About 5 seconds later, someones front right hits into my drivers side door. They excited the Randalls parking lot and crossed over into the space between two medians and ran into me. It was like they were planning to turn directly into my lane, they weren't even trying to stop at the median.. They came out of nowhere on my left, I was looking straight ahead and all of a sudden, the impact. I was pushed over to the right lane, then I think I shifted lower since the impact slowed me down...pressed emergency lights, noticed they weren't trying to pull over and began to panic! Tried to shift and get back up to speed asap but as I was nearing the Richmond Wilcrest light, I was going too fast to break, shift, and turn right smoothly without spinning so I ended up spinning onto the median a little while trying to turn. Good thing the light barely changed to green for opposing traffic as I was backing off the median. But by the time I got back onto Richmond, I mostly lost them and wasn't sure if they went straight or turned...I ended up turning but I should've just went straight...sigh. The drivers door is messed up but closable and the auto lock is jamming.

Theres nothing that can be done, so I feel helpless. I just don't understand anything anymore. I know this happens to plp all the time and even some of you guys, multiple times..

Pray that I learn the strength to get through it like you did if you've gone through frustrating car stuff. To not blame myself on the what ifs I could've done. Is this something God is using to shake me up even more and rely on him? Does he really have to do that? I already don't have much else but to rely on him anyways. Or is this something Satan is using to throw me off track, keep me down, blame God..? I'm just so confused. I don't even want to bother rationalizing or analyzing anything anymore. Things are just they way they are and I have to work with it.


thanks for reading,

jessica