day 2

small group was a little overwhelming today. There were things about "better" wanting something better than what we have, losing our lives to save it, etc...My brain is still trying to gather all the pieces of everything that was said tonight. But he knew what the line of questions was parallel to. I still feel like there is something unsaid between us and we brush it (or mainly he brushes it) under the rug and everything is "ok."

I want to write and remember everything about earlier tonight, but at the same time I don't. Plus I'm forgetting already...sigh. the thoughts are just everyywhere.

I'm in a good place of letting go and haven't thought about the whole thing in awhile. But tonights sg just raised questions and points that opened up the can of worms again and me trying to figure it out and understand. I just don't understand. I don't know what I want from it, from you. I wish none of this ever happened.



lunch - oatmeal with raisins and 3 spoons of vanilla yogurt.
snack - donut around 2ish
at randalls - sampled 3/4 of a chocolate chip cookie
at small group - celery w/peanut butter, honey mustard and onion pretzle pieces, a little hummus and pita chips, a few carrots, few spoons of josh's creme brulee
back at my aunt's  - soup, left over restaurant lobster, a chicken wing with rice, dim sum meatball, chinese green vegetable, ferrero chocolate, 3 cookies, an orange